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Mar 30, 2014 · What Was Done to You: Directed by Mark Piznarski. With Dermot Mulroney, Rachael Taylor, Lance Gross, James Lafferty. After Finley and Dunn meet with the President and First Lady, they soon realize that the Chief of Staff is the next parent sent on a dangerous mission to save his child.
- (270)
- Action, Drama, Thriller
- Mark Piznarski
- 2014-03-30
- Accept reality. When faced with bad news, it's easy to waste a lot of time thinking things like this can't be happening, or this shouldn't be happening to me.
- Don't worry about building strength right now. Trying to build mental strength in the midst of a crisis is like lifting weights right before you try to pick up a heavy box.
- Seek support. Talk to your friends. Ask for help from a professional. Reach out to your loved ones. Whatever you do, make sure you that you ask questions, tell people what you need, and get the emotional support that could assist you.
- Practice self-care. As difficult as it may be to eat and sleep, it's important to take care of your body when you're in the midst of a crisis. Go for a few short walks when you can, make healthy eating choices a priority even when you're pressed for time, and rest your body and your mind.
- Overview
- DO: Have a plan from the beginning
- DON’T: Make decisions without their consent
- DO: Set reasonable expectations upfront
- DON’T: Blame or shame
- DO: Name your needs and boundaries clearly
- DON’T: Personalize their behavior
- DO: Practice rigorous self-care
- DON’T: Wait until your resentment builds up
- DO: Kindly step back when you need to
No one — not even the most energetic among us — has an unlimited supply of emotional resources.
But I know how much we wish we did. When someone we love is struggling with their mental health, oftentimes our instinct is to throw ourselves into the fray… but without being thoughtful about what kind of support we offer, we risk burning out.
If you’re reading this, you probably know what I mean.
In my own history, I’ve been both the person in crisis and the supporter. And I know firsthand that when someone hits bottom, it’s hard not to get swept up in the intensity. We forget ourselves sometimes. We go all-in, just to find ourselves depleted and resentful.
I wrote this because, having seen both sides, I know just how difficult it can be.
It hurts to give someone every last ounce of compassion that you have, just to find them still immobilized by their despair, not seeming to get any better.
If you know someone is in crisis, the chances are high that they’ll need more than just your support, and they’ll need it for the long haul, including that of professionals.
Your loved one will need a strong network of care, as well as a plan if things should escalate. Thankfully, that’s something that can be organized upfront.
That’s a WRAP!
Many mental health professionals recommend that individuals have a Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP). This can include:
•phone numbers for a therapist, psychiatrist, and other relevant healthcare providers or healers
•contact info of family members and friends that can offer support
There’s a common assumption that people who are struggling with their mental health can’t be trusted to make their own decisions.
But most of the time, this simply isn’t true. Whenever possible, we should involve our loved one in any and all decisions that impact them.
This is especially true when we’re considering making decisions that could further traumatize them. Encounters with police officers — including wellness or welfare checks — can be terrifying, and in some cases, have turned deadly, particularly for Black people and people of color.
It’s best to familiarize yourself with local crisis teams and reach out to your loved one and others in their support system ahead of time to determine the safest course of action in an emergency.
If someone has called 911, take the following precautions as harm reduction:
•Request an officer that’s trained in crisis intervention (CIT).
Avoid overextending yourself or offering high levels of support indefinitely. You can do this by ensuring that your loved one understands your expectations of them at this time.
If you expect them to be in therapy, for example, you can ask if they intend to find a therapist and within what timeframe (assuming, of course, that they have access). If you’re expecting that you won’t be the only person they rely on for emotional support, ask who else is on their team and how you can support them in accessing additional support.
It can be tempting to criticize our loved ones when they aren’t making the choices that we ourselves would make.
For example, your loved one may be withholding information from their therapist, using alcohol or drugs to cope, or making impulsive decisions that appear to be making things worse.
However, blame and shame rarely motivate people to make changes to their behaviors.
What your loved one needs more than anything is unconditional love and positive regard. Rather than criticizing their choices, it’s best to extend support that they can then choose to accept if they feel able to.
For example, for a loved one who’s struggling with alcohol, you might say, “Hey, I’ve noticed you’re drinking a lot more than usual and it’s worrying me. Can I help you find some resources and support around that?”
Helping them make better choices for their own well-being will do a lot more good than shaming them for the ways they’re choosing to cope.
You are allowed to have boundaries. In fact, you really should. Knowing what your limits are can help prevent taking on too much and experiencing burnout.
It’s hard to set boundaries you didn’t know you needed, though. And many of us don’t know what our limits are until they’re tested.
No one chooses to be in crisis, and a mental health crisis is not an accurate reflection of who someone is.
Defining someone by their struggles can have a deep impact on how they internalize what’s happening and their ability to recover.
A former friend of mine once described supporting me through a depressive episode as “being sucked into [my] world.” By defining “my world” as a dark and despairing one, I was left feeling as though depression was at the core of who I was, and that I was a burden on the people I love.
Our words have a tremendous impact on other people. If we want people to have faith in themselves and their ability to live a full life, we need to be mindful of how we frame their struggles.
This is a common refrain, I know, but it bears repeating: An abundance of self-care is critical when we’re supporting someone in crisis.
It can be especially helpful when we schedule it in advance, so we know when to anticipate a break and can protect that time by setting our boundaries accordingly.
Don’t wait until you’re resentful, burnt out, and fed up before practicing self-care and taking the time you need to recharge.
If you had a leaky pipe in your basement, you wouldn’t wait until your basement flooded to fix it, would you?
Have some TACT!
Before stepping back from supporting someone in crisis, remember TACT: Timing. Consider the timing of your actions. Do they have other support around them, and if so, can they commit to reaching out to them? Will your withdrawal result in a worsening crisis, and if so, is there someone within their support system you can alert in case there is an emergency? When is their next support group or therapy appointment? Confirm that they have the support they need in your absence. Accountability. Take accountability. This can be challenging for people, because sometimes we feel exhausted and resentful by this stage. But it’s critical not to blame the person who’s in crisis, the same way you wouldn’t blame someone who was sick with cancer for the stress that results from their struggles. Accountability means being apologetic if boundaries weren’t clearly communicated, not blaming the other person for things outside their control, and owning where you may have overextended yourself. Check-in. Setting a date and time to check in next can be helpful reassurance so that your loved one knows you aren’t abandoning them. It can be hard to feel like you’re losing crucial support at a time when you need that support most. Touching base is a great way to affirm for your loved one that they still matter to you, and that the space you’re taking is temporary. Transparency. It’s crucial to communicate your expectations and boundaries for the time that you’re apart, especially because they’re changing. If you need them to stop texting as frequently, say so. If you aren’t able to follow through on a commitment you made (like driving them to a particular appointment), let them know (see also: timing). Don’t assume that they can read your mind! Was this helpful?
- Sam Dylan Finch
Sep 23, 2023 · Existential crises: These types of inner conflicts that lead to a crisis are related to ideas like your life purpose, direction, and spirituality. A midlife crisis is an example of a crisis that is rooted in existential anxiety. Situational crises: Sudden and unexpected crises include accidents and natural disasters.
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- Remember your values. The opportunity to act according to our deepest priorities is one of the great benefits of having to weather crises. Life-or-death threats remind us of what matters in the grand scheme.
- Try not to panic. I know, I know: It's easier said than done. But there is a lot we can do to slow our ride on the anxiety train.
- Take care of yourself. Now is not the time to stop exercising and eat too much pie. Well, for me it has been, but I'm working on it! It's understandable to be swayed by this crisis toward coping mechanisms inconsistent with our health goals, but we can mitigate the negative effects of this situation on our self-care behaviors if we try!
- Distract yourself. Keep busy and amused, varying your activities and remaining active and socially interactive, without breaking rules of containment for slowing the spread of the virus.
Jan 2, 2024 · Touching or picking up an object near you and focusing on the texture, color, shape, and feel of it. Taking slow, deep, controlled breaths and focusing your attention on your breathing. Taking a bite of food or sip of a beverage and concentrating on the taste, texture, and feel of the food or drink. Noticing your surroundings, including the ...
Jul 7, 2023 · Effective crisis intervention involves connecting to the person in crisis and talking them through specific steps to ensure their immediate safety as well as make appropriate plans for future care. Many crisis resources utilize a six-step model developed by Dr. Richard James. This model includes the following six steps: Define The Problem. In ...
