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- Taking things personally is often a byproduct of this bargain. When we take things personally, we give certain individuals more power over us than they deserve or should ever be allowed to have. In effect, you are allowing someone to question what you feel and believe.
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Jul 3, 2010 · So why do we have a problem with taking things personally? Is everyone who struggles with it a narcissist? And what can we do about it?
- You’Re A Social Perfectionist
- You Use Negative Self-Talk as Motivation
- You’Re Afraid to Be Proud of Yourself
- You Don’T Know How to Be Assertive
- You Get Lost in Your Own Stories
- You Spend Too Much Time with The Wrong People
- You Don’T Know Your Values
- All You Need to Know
Most of us associate the term perfectionismwith performance: 1. He’s such a perfectionist… If he doesn’t get the top grade in the class he thinks he’s a failure. 2. I don’t know why she has to be such a perfectionist about proofreading these monthly reports? No one actually reads them anyway… But there’s an incredibly common—though rarely-talked-ab...
Most of us grow up learning that the only way to be successful in life is to be tough on ourselves. And inevitably, this leads to a subtle but powerful habit of negative self-talk. Like the drill sergeant hurling insults at his new recruits in order to “make men out of them,” many of us adopt a similar attitude toward ourselves: We think that if we...
Ah, pride… Everyone’s favorite sin! In part, because of Western culture’s Christian heritage, many people grow up believing that pride is bad, or sinful even. After all, that’s why Lucifer got thrown out of heaven and why Adam and Evegot expelled from Paradise, right? Thinking too much of themselves? Actually I’m not so sure… Now, I’m no theologian...
Most people fall into one of two dominant communication styles: 1. Passive: When you’re overly accommodating of other people, afraid to express your own opinions, and generally hold yourself back in order to keep the peace and not rock the boat. 2. Aggressive: You ignore or devalue other people’s preferences and opinions and tend to be domineering ...
Taking things personally usually happens after we’ve been criticized, put down, or somehow insulted by someone else. And while it’s tempting to see the other person’s comment as the thing that hurt us, that’s not technically true… About 50 years ago, cognitive scientists finally validated a theory of emotion that philosophers had been trying to con...
It’s fairly common knowledge that as babies and small children, we learn about ourselves through the people around us: 1. When a baby smiles and her mother smiles back at her, she learns that someone is there to be responsive to her. 2. When a child scrapes her knee and a compassionate parent is there to clean it off and put a Band-Aid on, she lear...
Like we talked about in #5 above, things don’t make us unhappy, it’s the stories we tell ourselves about what happens that makes us unhappy. This means that the key to not taking things personally and letting someone’s criticism consume us is to create an alternative story about what that criticism means: 1. Instead of I’m a loser your story could ...
In order to stop taking things personally, you need to understand the real reasons why you do it. Only then can you work to undo the habits keeping you stuck: You’re a social perfectionist You use negative self-talk as motivation You’re afraid to be proud of yourself You don’t know how to be assertive You get lost in your own stories You spend too ...
The whole world can gossip about you, and if you don’t take it personally you are immune. Someone can intentionally send emotional poison, and if you don’t take it personally, you will not eat ...
Aug 26, 2014 · Key points. When someone takes things personally, they allow another person to tell them who they are. Before taking something personally, it helps to reflect on how important the...
Sep 28, 2023 · Free Assessment. What Causes People to Take Things Personally? Low self-esteem or low self-confidence are common conditions that make someone more likely to take others’ words or actions personally. When someone does not think highly of themselves, they are more likely to think that others also feel negatively about them.
May 1, 2024 · Why do people say, ‘Don't take it personally’? People often say, “Don’t take it personally,” when they want to offer feedback or an opinion without offending you. They may recognize that their comments could be interpreted the wrong way and aim to preempt any hurt feelings.
