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- Governments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation.You have no choice.
- Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. George Carlin. Funny, Life, Witty.
- Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. George Carlin. Nature, Philosophy, Stupid.
- Keep in mind, the news media are not independent; they are a sort of bulletin board and public relations firm for the ruling class-the people who run things.
- “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” ― George Carlin.
- “The planet is fine. The people are fucked.” ― George Carlin.
- “Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” ― George Carlin, When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?
- “Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do.
- "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. "
- "Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. "
- "Some people see things that are and ask, 'Why?' Some people dream of things that never were and ask, 'Why not?' Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
- "Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit."
Browse the best quotes by George Carlin, a famous American comedian and satirist. Find his witty and insightful observations on life, death, religion, politics, and more.
- George Carlin Quotes and Funny Jokes About Life and Perspective
- George Carlin Quotes and Jokes About Humanity
- George Carlin Quotes and Jokes About Politics and Religion
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“I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.” – George Carlin “If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?” – George Carlin “Some people see things that are and ask, ‘Why?’ Some people dream of things that never were and ask, ‘Why not?’ Some people have to go to work and...
“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.” – George Carlin “Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” – George Carlin “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.” – George Carlin “Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large gro...
“Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish...
“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” – George Carlin “May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.” – George Carlin “The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.” – George Carlin “Scratch any cynic, and you will find a disappointed idealist.” – G...
Mae West QuotesVince Lombardi QuotesMuhammad Ali QuotesMother Teresa QuotesEnjoy over 60 hilarious quotes and jokes by the late comedian George Carlin, who was known for his unconventional and vulgar comedy routines. He talked about politics, religion, humanity, and more with his signature wit and humor.
- January Nelson
May 2, 2022 · Celebrate the legacy of the late comedian George Carlin with his best inspirational quotes on various topics, from religion to politics. See how he combined wit, humor, and social commentary in his stand-up routines.
On the lookout for meaningful George Carlin quotes? Here's a collection that will make you laugh about and reflect on religion, politics, and society.
