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  2. Confucius Sayings Jokes. Why did Confucius say, “Man who stands on toilet is trying to get ahead in life”? Confucius say, “Man who eats too many fortune cookies may end up with a crumby outlook.” What did Confucius mean when he said, “Man who argues with a tree is barking up the wrong branch”?

    • Confucius Say man who run in front of bus get tired, man who run behind get exhausted.
    • Confucius Say woman who put husband in doghouse, soon find him in cathouse.
    • Confucius Say man who go to bed with sex on mind, wake up with solution in hand.
    • Confucius Say man who walk with hands in pocket, feel cocky all day.
    • Funny Confucius Quotes About Everyday Problems
    • Funny Confucius Quotes About Life
    • Funny Confucius Quotes About Dating and Marriage
    • Funny Confucius Quotes About Cars and Driving
    • Hilarious Confucius Quotes

    #1. “Man with one chopstick go hungry.” #2.“Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.” #3. “He who has a sharp tongue, cuts own throat.” #4. “A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.” #5. “Man who walk with nose in air very easy to hook.” #6. “Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.” #7. “If something happen but nobody post i...

    #13. “When called an idiot sometimes is better to be quiet, than open mouth and remove all doubt.” #14. “He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing.” #15. “War not determine who is right, war determine who is left.” #16. “Man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headac...

    #24. “When man bring wife flowers for no reason, there usually reason.” #25.“Passionate kiss like spider’s web soon lead to undoing of fly.” #26. “Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed.” #27.“Woman who dates gambler, gets cheated on.” #28. “Man with athletic finger make broad jump.” #29. “Woman laid in tomb may soon become mummy....

    #42. “Man who drive like hell, bound to get there!” #43.“I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.“ #44. “Don’t drink and park, accidents cause people.” #45. “Man who get hit by car, get that run-down feeling.” #46. “Man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind c...

    #47. “Man who jumps off cliff, jumps to conclusion!” #48. “Man who drop watch in whisky is wasting time.” #49.“A butler with no teeth is called an in-dentured servant.” #50. “Man who give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach will abdicate.” #51.“Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner.” #52. “Man who shoot off mouth must e...

  3. Introduction. Welcome to a comedic journey through the lens of 44+ Confucius says jokes. In this collection, we fuse the timeless wisdom of Confucius with a modern twist, delivering laughter and enlightenment in equal measure. Join us as we navigate through clever quips, witty observations, and humorous takes on age-old sayings.

    • Man who not poop for many days must take care of back log.
    • Man who fart in church, sit in own pew.
    • Man who sit on tack get point.
    • Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.
  4. Apr 7, 2024 · By weaving philosophical musings with a twist of humor, these jokes serve as bite-sized reflections that challenge us to see the world through a lens of light-heartedness. Ready to dive into a world where wisdom meets wit in the most unexpected ways?

  5. Mar 25, 2024 · “Confucius says: He who puts potatoes in oven, will get mashed potatoes.” These funny quotes by Confucius show that even the greatest philosophers can have a lighthearted side. Despite his serious teachings, Confucius knew the value of laughter and the importance of not taking life too seriously.

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