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May 30, 2023 · Published: May 30, 2023 6:50pm EDT. When Academy Awards boss Bill Kramer recently applauded comedian Chris Rock for speaking “his truth” about being slapped by Will Smith at the 2022 Oscars...
Mar 4, 2021 · March 4, 2021, 10:58 AM PST. By Cass R. Sunstein. Why do people credit falsehoods? Why don’t they dismiss them? Here is a large part of the answer: Most of the time, we tend to believe other...
May 22, 2023 · The attacks on truth-telling and fair play are the fundamental issues. Recognizing this and naming it to yourself is freeing and healing. You may be unable to change anything out in the world, but ...
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If you claim that you never lie, well, you’re a liar.
Those little white lies are slipping out more often than you realize: One study found that Americans, on average, tell about 11 lies per week. Other research shows that number is on the conservative side. A study published in the Journal of Basic and Applied Social Psychology found that 60 percent of people can’t go 10 minutes without lying at least once. And it gets worse: Those that did lie actually told an average of three lies during that short conversation.
Why do we do it?
In surveying more than 100 psychology graduate students currently or previously in therapy, Leslie Martin, PhD, of Wake Forest University's counseling center, found that of the 37 percent who reported lying, most did so "to protect themselves in some way — mostly to avoid shame or embarrassment, to avoid painful emotions and to avoid being judged."
60 percent of people can’t go 10 minutes without lying at least once.
You know, like when you’re too tired to go to brunch so you claim you have a stomach bug or you tell your boss you had train trouble when you really just overslept. Then there are the little fibs called pro-social lies which we are taught as kids are harmless. (Telling grandma that you love the new sweater when you actually hate it, or telling your wife she looks great in that outfit, when you actually think she looks a little on the heavy side.)
•What is gaslighting?
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•5 kinds of office jerks: Are you one of them?
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- They tell white lies — like saying they like your new haircut or think a baby is beautiful. It doesn’t hurt someone to receive a compliment, and in most cases, it’s not a big deal.
- The liar is ashamed — of ditching school, getting into trouble, failing at something, forgetting a meeting or appointment, incurring debt, being a sucker, being perceived as weak, stealing, or making a mistake.
- Liars live a lie with those they love. They are having an affair, secretly supporting another household, “going to work” when there is no longer a job, working at a job they are ashamed of, cheating you, engaged in criminal activity, or in the throes of addiction.
- They believe their own lies. They have convinced themselves that what they are saying actually happened or will happen. They are not happy people. The ones I have met are dissatisfied with themselves and create a parallel reality to present to others.
May 21, 2023 · W e all have moments in life when we know something big is happening, that we are stepping into a new and consequential experience, and our mind takes a mental Polaroid, an intensely clear ...
