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Mar 13, 2024 · Letting go is a spiritual and/or psychological process that requires relinquishing or lessening our attachment to outcomes, desires, and expectations and accepting what is. At its core lies the concept of nonattachment, a principle that is central in Daoist and Buddhist philosophy.
- Understand that the relationships you thought you’d have are going to be different than the ones you actually have. We must accept the person we are in this moment and the way other people are, too.
- Don’t be invested in the outcome when it comes to dealing with people, because it often leads to disappointment. Expectations have a way of keeping us stuck because they lead us to fear certain outcomes.
- Don’t live in chains when you have the key. We live with self-limiting beliefs that we let define who we are. We think, "I could never do that!" or "I could never make that happen!"
- Let go of the idea that you can control others’ actions. We really only have control over ourselves and how we act. You can’t change another person, so don’t waste your time and energy trying.
- Create A Positive Mantra to Counter The Painful Thoughts
- Create Physical Distance
- Do Your Own Work
- Practice Mindfulness
- Be Gentle with Yourself
- Allow The Negative Emotions to Flow
- Accept That The Other Person May Not Apologize
- Engage in Self-Care
- Surround Yourself with People Who Fill You Up
- Give Yourself Permission to Talk About It
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How you talk to yourself can either move you forward or keep you stuck. Often, having a mantra that you tell yourself in times of emotional pain can help you reframe your thoughts. For example, says clinical psychologist Carla Manly, PhD, instead of getting stuck in, “I can’t believe this happened to me!” try a positive mantra such as, “I am fortun...
It’s not uncommon to hear someone say that you should distance yourself from the person or situation that is causing you to be upset. According to clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, PhD, that’s not such a bad idea. “Creating physical or psychological distance between ourselves and the person or situation can help with letting go for the simple...
Focusing on yourself is important. You have to make the choice to address the hurt that you’ve experienced. When you think about a person who caused you pain, bring yourself back to the present. Then, focus on something that you’re grateful for.
The more we can bring our focus to the present moment, says Lisa Olivera, a licensed marriage and family therapist, the less impact our past or future has on us. “When we start practicing being present, our hurts have less control over us, and we have more freedom to choose how we want to respond to our lives,” she adds.
If your first response to not being able to let go of a painful situation is to criticize yourself, it’s time to show yourself some kindness and compassion. Olivera says this looks like treating ourselves like we would treat a friend, offering ourselves self-compassion, and avoiding comparisons between our journey and those of others. “Hurt is inev...
If your fear of feeling negative emotions is causing you to avoid them, don’t worry; you’re not alone. In fact, Durvasula says that many times, people are afraid of feelings such as grief, anger, disappointment, or sadness. Rather than feeling them, people just try to shut them out, which can disrupt the process of letting go. “These negative emoti...
Waiting for an apology from the person who hurt you will slow down the process of letting go. If you’re experiencing hurt and pain, it’s important you take care of your own healing, which may mean accepting that the person who hurt you isn’t going to apologize.
When we are hurting, it often feels like there is nothing but hurt. Olivera says practicing self-care can look like setting boundaries, saying no, doing the things that bring us joy and comfort, and listening to our own needs first. “The more we can implement self-care into our daily lives, the more empowered we are. From that space, our hurts don’...
This simple yet powerful tip can help carry you through a lot of hurt. We can’t do life alone, and we can’t expect ourselves to get through our hurts alone, either, explains Manly. “Allowing ourselves to lean on loved ones and their support is such a wonderful way of not only limiting isolation but of reminding us of the good that is in our lives.”
When you’re dealing with painful feelings or a situation that hurt you, it’s important to give yourself permission to talk about it. Durvasula says sometimes people can’t let go because they feel they aren’t allowed to talk about it. “This may be because the people around them no longer want to hear about it or [the person is] embarrassed or ashame...
Learn 12 tips for letting go of emotional pain and moving on from past hurts. Find out how to create a positive mantra, practice mindfulness, accept apologies, and seek professional help.
Learn what it means to let go and why it's hard to do. Find tips and examples for letting go of the past, the future, and someone you love.
Jul 26, 2021 · Here are some tips for letting go: 1. Expect the best. When letting go, try to think about the good things to come in the future and expect the best.
Jul 23, 2020 · Letting go interrupts the emotional feedback loop, like turning down the volume or clicking mute stops feedback on a video call. Letting go is a choice that happens at that instant.
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Nov 22, 2022 · Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for improved health and peace of mind. Forgiveness can lead to: Healthier relationships. Improved mental health. Less anxiety, stress and hostility. Fewer symptoms of depression. Lower blood pressure. A stronger immune system. Improved heart health.
