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Identify Gottman Four Horsemen in your conflict discussions, eliminate them and replace them with healthy, productive communication patterns.
Jun 20, 2024 · This worksheet can provide a great exercise for couples therapy sessions. Simply provide a short explanation of the four horsemen, provide the worksheet to both members of the couple, and once completed, let the discussion of their responses flow. Give your client’s therapy “homework”.
The Four Horsemen Worksheet. Famed couples researcher John Gottman has identified four styles of communicationcriticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling—that predict relationship failure. It is critical for each partner to recognize whether they perform any of these and what other behavior they can do in its place.
John Gottman’s FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE. John Gottman, Ph.D., is a well-respected psychologist and marriage researcher who reports that an unhappy marriage can increase your chances of becoming ill by 35% and take four years off your life!
GENTLE START UP. Talk about your feelings using “I” statements and express a positive need. BUILD CULTURE OF APPRECIATION. Remind yourself of your partner’s positive qualities and find gratitude for positive actions. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY. Accept your partner’s perspective and offer an apology for any wrongdoing. PHYSIOLOGICAL SELF-SOOTHING.
Stave off the relationship apocalypse by learning to recognize the four relationship horsemen and their antidotes, as posited by Dr. John Gottman, to prevent a relationship from ending in disaster. Created Date
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Researcher Dr. John Gottman named “four horsemen of the apocalypse,” which are four behaviors that are especially damaging to our relationships. The four horsemen are: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, Stonewalling. Read more about each, including definitions and examples here:
