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Betrayal trauma is a type of trauma that happens in key social relationships where the betrayed person needs to maintain a relationship with the betrayer for support or protection. Learn about the signs, causes, and recovery strategies for betrayal trauma in childhood and adult relationships.
- Forgive yourself. The truth is, people who feel no remorse and see no need to forgive themselves typically do not inspire in others a desire for reconciliation in the first place.
- Be honest. Once you’ve accepted in broad strokes that, for whatever reason, you made choices that led you to betray someone you care about, now it’s time to come clean with transparency and vulnerability.
- Be genuinely sorry. A tough question the one who was betrayed is likely to ask is this: “Are you truly sorry you did this to me, or only sorry the truth came out?”
- Don’t push. It should be abundantly obvious by now that trust is extremely fragile. Once damaged, it will not grow back quickly. As the one who did the betraying, it’s not for you to say where the benchmarks are or when they should be reached.
- Talk with someone you trust. Talking about the situation with someone you can trust can be healing and help you clear your thoughts. You can turn to a close friend or loved one, but a therapist is also an option if you feel uncomfortable discussing it with people you know.
- Practice self-care. Taking care of your physical health can help you heal from betrayal. Licensed therapist and wellness coach Rebecca Capps explains, “Self-care after betrayal can include eating balanced meals, getting enough sleep, and engaging in activities that bring you joy.”
- Acknowledge and accept. Denying the betrayal won’t help you cope, but acknowledging the situation can. Then, you can accept and clarify what occurred, helping you move forward.
- Don’t blame yourself. When healing from betrayal, you might wonder if it’s your fault. This thinking is detrimental and can interfere with healing, so consider reminding yourself whenever necessary.
Nov 29, 2021 · How betrayal affects different types of relationships and how to cope with it. Learn why trust is fragile, revenge is destructive, and emotional walls are not the answer.
Sep 12, 2022 · Learn how to cope with trust challenges in relationships, whether they stem from trauma, attachment style, or past experiences. Find out the difference between paranoia and distrust, and how to communicate and rebuild trust with others.
May 24, 2021 · In the 1990s, psychologist Jennifer Freyd coined the concept "betrayal trauma" to describe what "occurs when the people or institutions on which a person depends for survival significantly violate that person's trust or well-being."
Nov 7, 2023 · People who have experienced some type of betrayal, such as unfaithfulness in a relationship, may develop trust issues that can interfere with future relationships. Trust issues can manifest in a variety of ways. For example, a person who finds it difficult to trust may not believe what other people say.
