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  2. Life of Brian Script Scene 3: Jesus' Lack of Crowd Control on the Mount The sketch: music. JESUS CHRIST: How blest are those who know their need of God. How blest are the sorrowful. They shall find consolation. How blest are those of gentle spirit. They shall have the earth for their possession.

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    Now, you listen here: 'e's not the Messiah, 'e's a very naughty boy! Now go away!
    So, there you are! I might have known it would end up like this. To think of all the love and affection I've wasted on you. Well, if that's how you treat your poor old mother in the autumn years of...
    And there shall in that time be rumours of things going astray, and there will be a great confusionas to where things really are, and nobody will really know where lieth those little things with th...
    A man shall strike his donkey.

    ... And the beast shall be huge and black, and the eyes thereof red with the blood of living creatures, and the whoreof Babylon shall ride forth on a three-headed serpent, and throughout the lands,...

    Cheer up, Brian. You know what they say: Some things in life are bad. They can really make you mad. Other things just make you swear and curse. When you're chewing on life's gristle, Don't grumble....

    Oh, what I wouldn't give to be spat at in the face. I sometimes hang awake at night dreaming of being spat at in the face.
    You lucky bastards! You lucky, jammy bastards!
    Mandy: So you're astrologers, are you? Well what is he then?
    Wise man: Mmmm?
    Mandy: What star sign is he?
    Wise man: Well, Capricorn.
    Mandy: Ehh, Capricorn, eh? What are they like?
    Wise men: He is the son of God, our Messiah. King of the Jews.
    A motion picture destined to offend nearly two thirds of the civilized world. And severely annoy the other third.
    See the movie that's controversial, sacrilegious, and blasphemous. But if that's not playing, see The Life of Brian.
    Honk if you love Brian.
    The film that is so funny it was banned in Norway.
    Nothing can alter the fact that if you were to make a list of all the greatest works of art in all fields and all the greatest contributors to those works of art, you would find that this scene of...
    Four hundred years ago, we would have been burnt for this film. Now, I'm suggesting that we've made an advance.
    I've always thought that Life of Brian was the best thing Python did by quite a long shot.
    Life of Brian quotes at the Internet Movie Database
    Monty Python's Life of Brian at Rotten Tomatoes
  3. Spectator I: I think it was "Blessed are the cheesemakers". Mrs. Gregory : Aha, what's so special about the cheesemakers? Gregory : Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.

    • 246 VOTES. Biggus D*ckus. Video: YouTube. Pontius Pilate: So, yaw fatha was a Woman? Who was he? Brian: He was a Centurion, in the Jerusalem Garrisons. Pontius Pilate: Weally?
    • 163 VOTES. Blessed Are The Cheesemakers. Video: YouTube. Man: I think it was, "Blessed are the cheesemakers"! Gregory's wife: What's so special about the cheesemakers?
    • 257 VOTES. Men And Babies. Video: YouTube. Stan: I want to have babies. Reg: You want to have babies?!?! Stan: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
    • 208 VOTES. Always Look On The Bright Side of Life. Video: YouTube. Man: Cheer up, Brian. You know what they say: some things in life are bad. They can really make you mad.
  4. www.quotes.net › movies › life_of_brian_Life of Brian Quotes

    For the rest of his life Brian (Graham Chapman) finds himself regarded as something of a Messiah yet he's always in the shadow of this Other Guy from Galilee. Brian is witness to the Sermon of the Mount but his seat is in such a bad location that he can't hear any of it ("Blessed are the cheesemakers?").

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  5. Jun 19, 2020 · By Sherman R. Frederick. There’s a wonderful bit in Monty Python’s movie “Life of Brian” in which two characters hear Jesus give the Sermon on the Mount. Unfortunately they are too far back to hear properly. When Jesus says “Blessed are the peacemakers” they mishear it as “cheesemakers.”.

  6. Jul 9, 2023 · Rather than “Blessed are the Peacemakers,” Jesus is thought to have said “Blessed are the Cheesemakers”; and it was the Greek, not the meek, who will inherit the earth. And so it goes.

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