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  1. 7 hours ago · Me: “911, what is your emergency?” The caller sounds like an old lady. Caller: “I heard a bird chirping in my house, but I can’t find it!” Me: “Oh, well, if you could call Animal Control, I can—”

  2. 7 hours ago · Book review of Greetings from Next Door Synopsis: When Clay moved into the house beside environmentally-aware Glyn with his monster truck and stole all her peace and goodwill, sparks flew—as well as annoying dreams of mistletoe.

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